heathrowga: (Default)
[personal profile] heathrowga
Last night, we went out for dinner to a restaurant with an attached play area. (Aren't we fancy?) I don't cook on Saturday nights, and we didn't want to spend a ton of money. The kids were happy to get their ya-yas out, and Tom and I got to read for a bit. Everyone wins.

After a bit, an older couple comes in with their grandkids. The grandmother and I start chatting. I mention how nice it is that she's giving her child a date night. She laughs nicely, and says she loves to do it. We continue on chatting a bit here and there. Our kids are roughly the same age, and they're all playing together nicely.

As the older couple is leaving, we're making our goodbyes. Her husband has led the kids out of the area and she leans over our table. "It's sad, you know. It's really sad. My son is really trying to save the marriage. The wife has been cheating on him for a year. The kids don't know exactly what happened, but they know Mommy is bad."

The only response I could come up with was, "I'm sorry to hear that!  I hope things work out in some way!"

I was bummed out all night because of this woman deciding to tell me her family's dirty laundry. I don't think I have encountered that level of stranger overshare since I left grad school.

Date: 2010-05-30 03:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] raving-liberal.livejournal.com
The whole "Mommy is bad" thing breaks my heart. However bad Mommy may have been to Daddy, I hope Grandma and Daddy aren't telling those kids that she's bad.

Date: 2010-05-30 03:19 pm (UTC)
ext_432: (Default)
From: [identity profile] zoethe.livejournal.com
She said "the kids know Mommy is bad." That pretty much tells the story. Which is extremely sad, and an attitude that is probably going to doom reconciliation.

Date: 2010-05-30 07:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] heathrow.livejournal.com
That is what floored me. I believe that adults should keep "adult business" between the two adults as much as possible. For the kids (ages 4 and 6) to know "mommy is bad" is just wrong. Mom should still be one of the two Gods in that household.

Date: 2010-05-30 07:51 pm (UTC)
ext_432: (Default)
From: [identity profile] zoethe.livejournal.com
Even if the parents managed to work things out, the MIL's attitude is probably going to damage things.

Date: 2010-05-31 02:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] heathrow.livejournal.com
Oh yes, indeedy.

Date: 2010-05-30 04:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lemon-says.livejournal.com
See, that kind of shit happens to me all the time. People feel compelled to tell me things. I think it's a vent through a safety valve, since they know you don't know anyone and can't pass on information.

It's a sad situation.

Date: 2010-05-30 07:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] heathrow.livejournal.com
I guess I usually have my bubble of "Please don't bother me, I am buried in a book" up better. Last night, I was interested in chatting.

This is what I get!

It's such a sad situation.

Date: 2010-05-30 04:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gratefulbambina.livejournal.com
That is sad, I think Lynn is right about getting it out by telling a stranger so they cannot pass the info on though it is weird that she would slam you without as they were leaving. I'm also hoping that since she did do it after the kids were out of the area that they don't discuss it in front of the kids.

Date: 2010-05-31 02:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] heathrow.livejournal.com
It was just such a nice friendly conversation until the very end! I could understand it better if she was dishing about it the whole time instead of dropping the bomb on her way out. It was like passing this huge burden to a stranger without asking permission. Just floored me, C.

Date: 2010-05-30 05:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] swamplilly.livejournal.com
That is wierd although I have been known to sometimes say to much as you can tell from my Facebook :).
Kaleb's mom told him everything and he constantly stresses that I don't have money for things he needs.
Breaks my heart when he is worried we will move and leave all this things behind like his mother did or that
we do not have money for his medicine.
Most of his seizures come from stress.

Date: 2010-05-31 03:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] heathrow.livejournal.com
Oh, I'll overshare to my friends and acquaintances, but I don't do it to the random people at the park, ya know? I just shut up and wait til I get on the Internet. :)

Poor Kaleb. He deserves to be healthy and free from those stresses. I was so happy to hear he's gaining such strides!

Date: 2010-05-30 08:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] peacockharpy.livejournal.com
I don't think I have encountered that level of stranger overshare since I left grad school.

OHHHhhhh, yeah.

Last night we were at a neighborhood block party. First one we've been to, thrown by some neighbors who happen to be in a band that plays in one of the local bars. So it's a block party and a party that their fans are invited to. Very wide open and friendly, until...

...the lead singer decides to way overshare about how dissatisfied they are at the current bar and how they (and their fans) aren't getting the respect they deserve! On the mike. At length. Ending in a "and you never know -- you might just show up to JB's and find we aren't there any more..."

(Me, internally: "... and the dismount ... with flounce! If this were the Internet you'd be disqualified."

Then she decided to go on and on about how people who want to remove prayer and the mention of God from school are cowards ("they're AFRAID to hear his name!") and don't know why this nation was founded.

(ME: "...shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion or prohibiting the free exercise thereof," yeah. That means more religions than just yours, get it?)

::headfoldingchair::

At least we met some nice people and their kids who are near our kids' ages.

Date: 2010-05-31 03:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] heathrow.livejournal.com
Goodness. If only she could have slammed a door after that public flounce!

I'm glad you met some new neighbors.

(deleted comment)

Date: 2010-05-31 03:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] heathrow.livejournal.com
All I wanted was to let my kids climb around and not tear up my house for a couple of hours. Dude.

Date: 2010-05-30 10:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] geobabe1.livejournal.com
Not nearly on the same level as this, but at the playground a little while ago, some guy was yelling across the play structure to some woman that he could see through her skirt. He was appreciative, at least, but I was so mortified for her. DUDE. SHUT UP.

Anyway. "Mommy is bad." Holy shit.

Date: 2010-05-31 03:15 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] heathrow.livejournal.com
Why would he yell that? So inappropriate! Sheesh.

I was just ... so sad all night. I couldn't shake that juju.

Date: 2010-05-31 04:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] geobabe1.livejournal.com
He started out by saying she shouldn't sit on the bench, I guess because the skirt was also short, which would have been plenty, but then he KEPT GOING. He was young, which doesn't really excuse being a boor, but I recall I used to perversely enjoy saying inappropriate things, and only later developed enough empathy to stop being an asshole and avoid embarrassing others in public.

Date: 2010-05-31 01:13 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nosneros-h.livejournal.com
Uh, AWKWARD.

Date: 2010-05-31 01:15 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] heathrow.livejournal.com
SERIOUSLY.

Date: 2010-05-31 01:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] travellight.livejournal.com
Oh, Lord. Too bad you can't keep a blood cap squirreled away in your for such emergencies and just start spontaneously bleeding from your mouth as necessary.

People tend to want to tell me things like that all the time. I, in return, tend to want to tell them how to handle it, but I have trained myself to say, "I'm sorry. I can't know this."

Date: 2010-05-31 02:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] heathrow.livejournal.com
She did it right as she was walking out, so I couldn't even grab my forehead in a faux migraine. I think I've earned the right to fake one.

Date: 2010-05-31 06:47 pm (UTC)
ximinez: (Default)
From: [personal profile] ximinez
Gramma needs an anonymous blog... Sometimes keeping a secret just puts such a weight on your spirit that it has to come out, and who's safer, who's less likely to pass it along, who's less likely to embarrass you about it than a perfect stranger that you're probably never going to see again...

Date: 2010-06-09 03:34 am (UTC)

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